Friday, November 20, 2009

One for Two

I really, really wanted both.
I thought I could have both.
I thought this year was going to turn around for us.
I thought maybe we'd catch a break.

7:15 ultrasound. We saw a heartbeat. Only one baby. Measuring right on at 6 wks 6 days. Graduated from fertility clinic to MFM. Got an ultrasound picture that I'm not really sure what to do with. It kind of freaks me out.

8:35 receive scores. 269 out of 275.

Lots of swear words.

I hate this. I hate seeing my husband disappointed. I hate that he is the hardest working person I know and that he deserves this so much and he doesn't get it I hate that he is sad. I hate it. I hate it.

One for two.

Thanks for waiting with me.

9 comments:

Bree said...

I think if you could only have one, you got the right one. But, I wish you got both. I hear the National board test is super rigorous. I don't know what to do with my u/s pics, either. They are sitting on my dresser. I hung Ella's up on the fridge. I can't do that anymore.

Tina said...

I am so sorry you didn't get both. I hope you two are able to find a way to stay positive and focus on happy thoughts...like the new little one. I know...easier said than done. xx
BTW, Congratiulations on the one!

Christy said...

Thinking of you....seeing the good...

margaret said...

A heartbeat is fantastic. Yay little bean...!!! I'm sorry you're disappointed that hubby's scores were not enough. You both deserve to have both work out for you. Hopefully, the situation will work itself out while you grow your little baby. Happy for you!!! Hugs

Kristy said...

As you know, i'm happy and sad for you guys. Thinking about you! xo

Bluebird said...

Well, shit. I'm sorry honey, for you and your sweet, hardworking hubby both. As the disappointment wears off I hope you're able to enjoy the awesome news also received today :) I am so, so happy for you.

FWIW, I stash all u/s pics in my desk. Doesn't feel right to hang them on the fridge, email to parents, etc., like before.


((Hugs)) to you!!!

JamieW said...

I am so sorry but I hope the good of the day outweighs the disappointment and that next year he will be distracted by a little baby while studying.

Christmas with Kasey said...

I'm sorry he didnt get both! Congrats on the heartbeat! If you want to keep the us forever make sure you keep them out of the light-it fades them. I made copies and stored the originals away. I know what your hubby is taking is WAY harder, but it took me 6 times to pass the test to get my teaching license...Many pos thoughts that the next time around is his last.

Holly said...

I wish it could've been 2 of 2. 269 out of 275 seems pretty darn good to me! Did it have to be 275 out of 275? I'm glad you got to see that little heart beating!