tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post2881376008091312668..comments2023-10-02T09:58:38.103-05:00Comments on Almost a Mother: I guess I just suck, then.Christyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01498901545149667223noreply@blogger.comBlogger15125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-42614844482261971232010-11-15T20:04:34.062-06:002010-11-15T20:04:34.062-06:00Ugh, people make some of the stupids comments that...Ugh, people make some of the stupids comments that are so offensive and show how obviously they have no freaking idea what they're talking about! So sorry you've had to deal wish such insensitivity towards your losses. Thinking of you and sending love ((hugs))rebeccahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06480554666969330506noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-4745791196331118072010-11-09T07:31:50.878-06:002010-11-09T07:31:50.878-06:00I'm sorry that you had to come across that pos...I'm sorry that you had to come across that post...certainly, as a Christian, you know that I absolutely believe that there are things that happen on this earth that I will never, never, never understand.<br /><br />But I also know that God very clearly tells us that His plans for us are for us to prosper and not to harm us...and when those bad things DO happen, it's because of the horrible world in which we live--not because God is playing puppet strings and tearing our hearts apart for some bigger lesson. His plan for us was NOT a broken world...but in giving us the ability to choose things for ourselves, there was no way to maintain perfection and allow free-will at the same time.<br /><br />Which is all theology and differs from person to person. What DOESN'T differ is that the loss of your child or children is NOT dependent on the type of Christian you are or aren't. My entire church, on a regular basis, constantly tells me that of all the people, they can't believe WE suffered what we did. I always say, "Why not? We're not any more special than the country of Haiti, where people are SO suffering for NO reason. Or Indonesia. Or poor little 13 year-old girls being sold into prostitution sex rings."<br /><br />Suffering and tragedy is not discriminating. Nor is the ability to be pregnant with and give birth to beautiful babies, when ALL ODDS are against them (the term "Crack Whore Mama" comes to mind.)....<br /><br />I am sure those people were truly trying to 'comfort' and encourage in the best way they know how...and the intention was well-purposed. But for those of us who know that God loves us (even when we feel SO abandoned) and hurts for us (again, even when we feel like He may have purposed our hurt)...for those of us who know there were no BETTER parents for those sweet little miracles we've lost...we know better.<br /><br />Sorry I always end up giving a novel in your comments!<br />Lots of love!!!!Lorihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01828552745708177768noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-59558037372713696012010-11-07T20:38:12.105-06:002010-11-07T20:38:12.105-06:00Ugh. So sorry. I'm thinking of you, and totall...Ugh. So sorry. I'm thinking of you, and totally get what you're saying. I have the same reaction to that FB post, and the sentiment overall of "everything happens for a reason."Christahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00239319282645616996noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-42251219595198549052010-11-07T16:23:31.907-06:002010-11-07T16:23:31.907-06:00That post on their wall is kind of awful - so, peo...That post on their wall is kind of awful - so, people who weren't chosen for twins, or whose twins passed... God didn't like them enough? That's just so... fundamentally wrong.<br /><br />I am sending you huge hugs, sweetie.Mother Knows Best Reviewshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07127811116486063201noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-64542018493848147612010-11-07T06:16:52.164-06:002010-11-07T06:16:52.164-06:00oh, and one more thing.
YOU DO NOT SUCK.oh, and one more thing.<br /><br />YOU DO NOT SUCK.Mirnehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13012378787039340510noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-1603577884814666772010-11-07T06:16:05.242-06:002010-11-07T06:16:05.242-06:00You are right. Completely.
That FB wall-post was...You are right. Completely.<br /><br />That FB wall-post was completely offensive. What a bunch of absolute crap.<br /><br />What you wrote about crackheads and people choosing to abort is completely true. <br /><br />I used to believe in god but I don't any more. For various obvious reasons.<br /><br />I wouldn't worry about your friend responding to your email. People who haven't lost a baby simply have no clue. Seriously. Her problem, not yours.Mirnehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13012378787039340510noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-69121936882134535022010-11-06T17:48:49.538-05:002010-11-06T17:48:49.538-05:00I'm so sorry and I hate that "It happened...I'm so sorry and I hate that "It happened for a reason". People tell me all the time one day I'll know why. I don't believe that. I don't believe that everyone who has had a child or children since I started trying are better parents than I would be. I don't believe that God intended for my children to die. I do believe firmly that He will bring good about from it, but I don't believe that's His plan! Sending you so much love!Denihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16241957159520703116noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-7039013589357734742010-11-06T16:04:42.355-05:002010-11-06T16:04:42.355-05:00I don't know how to respond to the comments ab...I don't know how to respond to the comments about 'it being God's plan' or 'there is a reason for it all' I have learned to control my tongue and am not as snippy as I were, but it being 'gods plan' is bull shit, plain and simple. Gods plan for my baby to suffer, to seize constantly having to be sedated until the sedation meds eventually caused respiratory failure..really? I always heard of God being just, how the hell is that just? <br />I am not going to lie, sometimes it would be 'easier?'(not sure if that is the right word) and for a long time I felt continually let down looking for reasons.. and it sucks, its not fair, but there is no reason..Life sucks sometimes, sometimes it doesn't so much.. but I want to ninja kick people who say such things to me.. your twins died because life isn't fair, Ella died because life isn't fair...its not because we don't have big enough hearts or because we didn't deserve happiness.. Everyone and there dog has had babies and is having babies, and it kills me to read comments like the one you read.. we all deserved our babies, just as much as any one else..Jenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07386710835021940223noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-89722593025909891432010-11-06T05:41:54.276-05:002010-11-06T05:41:54.276-05:00I don't believe that everything happens for a ...I don't believe that everything happens for a reason. I honestly don't. Personally, I think that's a cop out. <br /><br />I'm not surprised that comment offended you. What does that person imagine happened in cases like ours then?! God thought, yes these women look like good mothers, I will give them twins. Then he changed his mind?! Saw that we had some terrible flaw that meant we could only raise one child competently?! I don't believe that God works that way myself. <br /><br />Bit like the argument that used to really p*** me off that J was an answer to prayer. Because my prayers for her sister were obviously substandard?! <br /><br />I know that some people truly believe these statements and that's fine. Lucky for them in some ways. But I'm with you, I just can't.Catherine Whttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01618295389400457254noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-65647703611950020022010-11-05T23:16:04.789-05:002010-11-05T23:16:04.789-05:00Sometime you take the words right from my mouth......Sometime you take the words right from my mouth...that is all I can say. love u!Tinahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15149337445828424583noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-2449442597404030902010-11-05T21:29:56.955-05:002010-11-05T21:29:56.955-05:00i am sending you big, big hugs. even if there is a...i am sending you big, big hugs. even if there is a reason (which i think i believe), it doesn't make it any better and it definitely is not comforting to hear.crystal theresahttp://fragments.louielovescrystal.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-53591670899198141862010-11-05T20:36:07.457-05:002010-11-05T20:36:07.457-05:00I lost my son 5 months ago... and when someone tel...I lost my son 5 months ago... and when someone tells me "everything happens for a reason" I really just want to punch them in their face. IT just isn't true. I always say back that you can give purpose to a tragedy and live your life in an admirable way because of it... but the tragedy did not happen for that purpose... sometimes, sh** just happens.Whittneyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03846959063445980451noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-22393154963298232862010-11-05T18:43:15.932-05:002010-11-05T18:43:15.932-05:00Hi, I have been reading your blog for a while now....Hi, I have been reading your blog for a while now. I lost my son 10 weeks after pprom almost 4 months ago. Your post really struck a chord with me. <br /><br />There is no reason for this to happen to any of us as far as I am concerned. It really is just unfair. <br /><br />Oh and Facebook is always frustrating me... So many scan photos, so many references to pregnancy, I swear I didn't do that when I was pregnant!Loumaryhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03324396055973731510noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-2106999883111387462010-11-05T18:40:43.696-05:002010-11-05T18:40:43.696-05:00That sucks! It sucks that anyone has to go through...That sucks! It sucks that anyone has to go through losing a child or children. Some people just don't get it. And they say things that they think will make you feel better because they have never been there. And if it were true (about the whole God giving/or taking away your children) then why would he then grant you another child? I wish people could always know what to say and what not to say, le sigh.....Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04791352125068054223noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-10101258511307320.post-86340077577871001072010-11-05T18:24:19.796-05:002010-11-05T18:24:19.796-05:00I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my twin boys a...I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my twin boys almost 12 weeks ago. <br /><br />That comment is kind of offensive. So what, we all lost our children because we weren't going to be good parents to them? I don't think so. <br /><br />I am a religious person, not to the extreme or anything but I do believe in God. but even so...I can't say, "Oh, it happened for a reason." Because what I am thinking is..."What the hell reason could there be for my sons to die?" <br /><br />I don't know. <br /><br />((hugs))Trenahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15415933649130757226noreply@blogger.com